Last week, I felt off. Simple tasks that should have been routine became oddly difficult. My focus wavered, and resistance — an uninvited guest — began to settle in. As someone who teaches well-being and high performance, I approached this moment with curiosity. This wasn’t a failure; it was a chance to apply the tools I’ve shared with hundreds of thousands of people around the world.
First, I turned to my rhythms of resilience. These personal habits, when aligned, serve as a springboard for well-being. My Oura ring confirmed what I already sensed: sufficient restorative rest — an average sleep score of 85 out of 100 over the week. Despite a slight headache and a tickle in the throat, my energy was steady.
But something wasn’t right. Entrepreneurs often soldier on, pushing through challenges unless physically forced to stop. I canceled a few meetings to ease the load but pressed ahead on tasks that couldn’t be postponed. Yet, the fog persisted. It wasn’t just physical fatigue. Mentally, I was scattered, flitting from one task to another, unable to settle. As the day wore on, I found myself feeling depleted, frustrated and increasingly self-critical.
At the Resilience Institute, we often say that high performance is impossible without care. But in business, there are moments when the demand to perform feels non-negotiable. Whether it’s a critical sales call or an unmissable podcast recording, sometimes the show must go on. So, I kept going. Yet, beneath the effort, I knew something more profound was missing.
My forthcoming book, Start With Values, speaks to this very point. It explores how our core values — whether consciously realized or not — are the drivers behind every meaningful action. When our actions align with our values, even the smallest task brings a sense of fulfillment. This alignment creates the conditions for a life that feels resonant and alive. But last week, my actions weren’t aligned, and I could feel it.
Stepping back, I engaged in a process I’ve come to rely on: metacognition. This practice allows me to observe my thoughts as they arise, without judgment. As I watched my thoughts — frustration, impatience, self-criticism — I applied the principles of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). I accepted that I wasn’t in my optimal state and then committed to finding a solution rooted in my values.
Suddenly, it became clear: creativity, one of my top three core values, had been absent from my week. Creativity, for me, is about curiosity, exploration, and producing something new. It’s a vital part of who I am, and without it, my work becomes mechanical, draining and disconnected. The lack of creative engagement was quietly eating away at my sense of well-being.
I hadn’t created anything meaningful all week. And freedom, another key value, had also been neglected. I had confined myself indoors, skipping my usual outdoor runs and fresh air breaks because I felt slightly under the weather. For me, freedom isn’t just physical; it’s the ability to think, reflect and move without constraint. My routines had become rigid, and the absence of this flexibility was stifling.
The third value, kindness, was notably absent too. I wasn’t being kind to myself or others. Kindness, in its truest form, isn’t just about generosity toward others — it’s about showing compassion to yourself, especially when you fall short. Last week, I had been harsh, demanding more from myself without offering the care or space I needed to thrive.
Reconnecting with my values wasn’t an overnight transformation, but it was a beginning. I restructured my day — not the whole week, just the next hour. I found a creative outlet. An idea for a social media post that had been swirling in the back of my mind for months finally found its moment. It had sat unresolved, like a loose thread, generating low-level anxiety in the landscape of unfinished tasks. How many ideas and tasks do we leave undone, silently adding unnecessary weight to our mental load?
Once I allowed myself to enter a state of creative flow, everything shifted. Within that hour, I felt fulfillment returning. Guilt dissipated. Had I forced myself to grind through emails and Teams chats, I likely would have accomplished little of real value. Instead, I created something meaningful, something that aligned with my values. It was a reminder that creative expression isn’t a luxury; it’s a necessity for those of us who value it deeply.
After this, I stepped outside. I allowed the sun to stroke my skin for a few moments, reconnecting with my value of freedom. That brief intermission was enough to recalibrate my energy. When I returned to the mundane tasks I had been avoiding, they no longer seemed insurmountable. I had shifted from frustration to clarity, from self-criticism to flow. In one afternoon, I had realigned with my values, and that alignment made all the difference.
This is what it means to live a values-aligned life. Our values are the foundation of resilience, guiding us when we feel lost or disconnected. By reconnecting with them, we unlock purpose, joy and clarity. This isn’t just a philosophical concept — it’s a practical tool for navigating the complexities of modern life. When you feel off, as I did last week, don’t just push harder. Pause. Reflect. Realign your actions with your values. In doing so, you’ll find that the path forward becomes not only clearer but lighter.